r/shittymoviedetails Mar 28 '23

Five Nights at Freddy’s (2023) will be the third horror movie this year where the main antagonist is a bear default

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8.6k Upvotes

1.1k

u/SatnWorshp Mar 28 '23

I can't wait for the next one. I hear that Fozzy Bear loses it because he finally realized that everyone was laughing at him and not his jokes.

231

u/DammitDad420 Mar 28 '23

Meth Fozzie

Wakka wakka wakka

27

u/delvach Mar 29 '23

sniff sniff "Hey Fozzie.. what's that smell?"

"Dude dude dude! You're gonna love this! I'm making bacon my lil green man! YEAH!"

"Okay Foz but where did yo..," stammered Kermit as his heart curled up in horror, and, voice wavering, called out, "Honey?"

9

u/Under383 Mar 29 '23

Honey Glazed, wakka wakka

45

u/StoopidestManOnEarth Mar 28 '23

I was laughing at his jokes...

22

u/Haver_Of_The_Sex Mar 29 '23

i was saying boo-urns

24

u/Bug1oss Mar 28 '23

You know how I got these scars, Kermit?

18

u/MCWarhammmer Mar 29 '23

"I'll tell you a joke. What do you get when you cross a mentally ill Muppet with an audience that belittles him and treats him like trash. I'll tell you what you get, you get what you fucking deserve!" Shoots Statler and Waldorf

15

u/maroonedpariah Mar 29 '23

Then he goes "it's Fozzin' time"

736

u/Depressednacho69 Mar 28 '23

Wait cocaine bear fnaf and what else? Paddington 3??

794

u/Master_Lukiex Mar 28 '23

The Winnie the Pooh horror

436

u/StoopidestManOnEarth Mar 28 '23

Oh right, because the literary rights went to public domain a year or so ago. But not Disney's rights. So you can make a movie about winnie the pooh, you just can't use the same imagery or storylines of the Disney media. Right?

Because, I have a great movie idea about an anthropomorphic bear who enters an anal sex competition. I call it Winning the Poo.

I have a very special scene for a donkey written into it.

108

u/Ali_knows Mar 28 '23

Just like G.I. Jane 2, can't wait to see it !

57

u/CelticRaider9 Mar 29 '23

Keep my wife’s name out your f*cking mouth!

75

u/Snazzle-Frazzle Mar 28 '23 edited Mar 29 '23

The funny part is that not all of the Winnie the Pooh characters are public domain. A few years from now when Tigger and Eeyore enter public domain is when we will probably see a sequel of that God awful film.

18

u/BatatinhaGameplays28 Mar 29 '23

At least Eeyeore, the Owl and the rabbit were mentioned right? Tigger was just forgotten.

21

u/BathtubKenobo Mar 29 '23

Tigger hasn’t entered the public domain and won’t until next year so only Disney can use him until 2024

63

u/Cyynric Mar 28 '23

It was so fucking bad. Not even in a fun, schlocky horror movie way either, it was just boring. We were falling asleep.

19

u/DianSnivy Mar 29 '23

Because it was never intended to be an actual movie, it was just a joke premise that they made with the minimum possible budget for a Feature Film, with hoping that the shock value would draw enough people to see it (It did).

8

u/Crashbrennan Mar 29 '23

I still think it was a Disney false-flag to try to get people on their side about copyright extensions.

3

u/AaronianKenrod Mar 29 '23

The production company that made the film is part of a bunch of companies that make super low budget horror films based on generic concepts

1

u/Upsetcupofoj1230 Mar 29 '23

That was this year? It feels like ages ago

1

u/FlaydenHynnFML Mar 29 '23

Really goes to show how forgettable the movie was low key

1

u/franklollo Mar 29 '23

China simulator

27

u/magseven Mar 28 '23

Batista in "Knock at the Cabin"?

16

u/Depressednacho69 Mar 28 '23

God will punish the whole world before he sees a gay couple happy. Also this is humanities fault for some reason - m night.shyamalan

Hate that movie

11

u/[deleted] Mar 29 '23

It's based on a book, no? Wouldn't wholly blame m night for the story

Still I hadn't considered your viewpoint. Didn't love the movie when I watched it, but that was mostly due to the usual m night gimmicks

17

u/Depressednacho69 Mar 29 '23 edited Mar 29 '23

The books ending they decide not to kill anyone because they refuse to support a God who'd punish a gay couple. M night changed the ending to make it more like God was right for this..

Also the movie got really boring once u find out they weren't lying as there was no more mystery to it. I think the movie would of done it self a favor if it never confirmed what they were saying was true or atleaat not till the end

5

u/TitleBulky4087 Mar 29 '23

The book never confirmed if it was really happening or not

1

u/Depressednacho69 Mar 29 '23

Ah I didn't know that but now I'm even more confused as to why he changed it

1

u/TitleBulky4087 Mar 30 '23

I haven’t seen the movie yet. Planning on watching soon. I enjoyed the book and the was it/wasn’t it ending made perfect sense to me when I saw M Night (idk how to spell his last name) was directing it strictly because of that. I’ll have to give it a try and see how it differs.

19

u/FlamingFury0424 Mar 29 '23

Cocaine bear is horror?

11

u/Sro201 Mar 29 '23

Admittedly it was pretty funny but a few scenes are supposed to be suspenseful, i.e. no audio and sudden bear appearance + loud noise for scare. I really just thought the movie was hilarious in some parts so I kinda forgot about it

273

u/Bitter_Position791 Mar 28 '23

if it doesn't get delayed for the 10th time

95

u/DaveGrohl23 Mar 28 '23

It's doubtful, it's very much on track.

83

u/wafflepantsblue Mar 28 '23

It's not coming out this year though surely? I thought it had barely entered pre production due to scripting delays.

70

u/Tattierverbose Mar 28 '23

Filming began at the start of February, so I'd say production's well under way

18

u/Phillyboishowdown Mar 29 '23

They finished filming Creed 2 only a few months before it came out, so here’s hoping!

1

u/wafflepantsblue Mar 29 '23

I'm thinking this will probably need more special effects and it could be in post production for a while due to perfectionism from the game creator in the editing stage.

29

u/Bo_the_oboe Mar 28 '23

It is currently filming, actually.

15

u/DaveGrohl23 Mar 28 '23

If they keep going the way they are, it very well could be out by December or maybe a bit earlier. It's all guess work though.

12

u/wafflepantsblue Mar 28 '23

Damn. I'm not expecting anything amazing from this film considering what happened with slenderman, and the somewhat confusing storyline of the games - but we'll see what happens.

30

u/DaveGrohl23 Mar 28 '23

I honestly don't care if it sucks ass. I just wanna be along for the ride. It's funny to me, the idea of unironically saying "Hey, wanna go see the FNAF Movie?".

9

u/wafflepantsblue Mar 28 '23

yeah true. its so ironic at this point but I'm sure it can't be that bad. I kinda hope they make it cheesy and funny.

3

u/cabbage16 Mar 29 '23

I enjoy the FNAF games for what they are and enjoy everyone trying to make sense of it's nonsense but I haven't had much hope for a movie being very good. When I learned Matthew Lillard was starring in though and that the Henson company is involved, that gave me more hope for the cheesy funny reason you said.

16

u/pionmycake Mar 28 '23

Honestly, I had pretty low hopes. But Matthew Lillard is playing the villain and the Henson Creature Shop are building actual animatatronics/puppets instead of just using cgi for everything. It might actually be a good movie

7

u/[deleted] Mar 29 '23

henson creature shop is most definitely a plus

5

u/Dawanna Mar 29 '23

You just sold me the movie. Could've just said Mathew Lillard is villain and i would be down.

2

u/pionmycake Mar 29 '23

I'm really hoping it's just a 2 hour long version of the end of Scream except Billy Loomis is replaced by a puppet of a bear

5

u/patrickwithtraffic Mar 28 '23

I mean films based on trends never strike while the iron's hot and this film has been in development hell for a long time. I genuinely think it'll suffer the same problems as the 50 Shades films, where the creator consistently gets in the way of the adaptation out of a sense of "rightful canon" that refuses necessary changes to the medium.

1

u/Magmorix Mar 29 '23

It would be really fun if they could get it out mid November to coincide with the date of the first game

1

u/DaveGrohl23 Mar 29 '23

At the rate it looks like they're going... it's not impossible.

9

u/CitizenFiction Mar 28 '23

I mean... the picture in the post is literally a set photo. I think it's safe to say it's on track. I don't know about this year but it's definitely happening.

4

u/Standard-Sleep7871 Mar 29 '23

give them time, they're still figuring out the lore

72

u/Atomic12192 Mar 28 '23

Isn’t William technically the main villain?

41

u/DeninjaBeariver Mar 28 '23

Yes, voiced by jack black

10

u/wi5hbone Mar 29 '23

And voiced by bruce campbell

3

u/Aisianfaailure3908 Mar 29 '23

Yes, and they made him overpowered, he killed those 5 kids using only 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of his power, thanks yo his actor being Shaggy

70

u/Creeperatom9041 Mar 28 '23

Markiplier hasn't been uploading around the same time this has been filming... hmmmm...

53

u/-The-Character- Mar 29 '23 edited Mar 30 '23

I mean he is filming his own movie or something, though I think he’s said he cant confirm or deny that he’s in the fnaf movie

Edit: I looked into it a bit more and he said that he “can’t say anything” which some people are thinking means be may be under an nda or not allowed to reveal anything.

4

u/God_is_carnage Mar 29 '23

He said the scheduling didn’t work out on the latest episode of the Distractible podcast.

43

u/callmedaddyshark Mar 28 '23

... Which isn't that many nickels, but it's weird it happened three times

58

u/TheGuy3273 Mar 28 '23

Is that a real bts photo?

110

u/Mattshodo Mar 28 '23

No, it's a photo of the Fnaf movie set.

26

u/Witty_Championship85 Mar 28 '23

Smh my head 🤦‍♀️

11

u/theraybenton Mar 29 '23

Lmao my ass off

10

u/Chaos_Ribbon Mar 29 '23

Stupid as fuck but that might have been the funniest thing I've ever read.

3

u/SlimeMob44 Mar 29 '23

Yes it was released a month or 2 ago

48

u/brookeb725 Mar 28 '23

FREDDY FAZBEAR’S pigga place

7

u/88superguyYT Mar 28 '23

Script no longer exists

18

u/temporaryfriend Mar 28 '23

Cocaine Bear is a hero! How dare you besmirch that working, single mother’s good name?!

15

u/DarkFish_2 Mar 28 '23

And is just March.

8

u/N00N3AT011 Mar 28 '23

It's actually real wtf

8

u/switchbladeeatworld Mar 29 '23

cocaine bear was the protagonist excuse me

4

u/JCamson04 Mar 29 '23

So cocaine bear and then this, what’s the last one?

10

u/Urbanfalcon756 Mar 29 '23

Just like the angry birds movie, space jam 2, and other movies that heavily revolve around memes and Internet culture I feel like this movie is 5 years minimum too late.

6

u/totallynotdragonxex Mar 29 '23

well it's been delayed like 30 times, sooooo

5

u/nmkd Mar 29 '23

It was announced just months after the fkrst game came out, this movie has been like 8 years in the making (well mostly planning I guess)

2

u/soapsuds202 Mar 29 '23

why are we hating on the angry birds movie

3

u/militarylions Mar 29 '23

It's almost unbearable.

2

u/Devious_Android88 Mar 29 '23

implying the movie is coming out this year implying Cocaine Bear and Winnie the Pooh are not the protagonists

2

u/HandsOfAsclepius Mar 29 '23

You know sometime you're bound to leave her

But for now you're going to stay

In the year of the bear

2

u/Klutzy-Pea2015 Mar 29 '23

Last year was Pinocchio, this year is deadly bears

2

u/Rampey1 Mar 29 '23

I don’t think Cocaine Bear was a horror movie.

2

u/LB3PTMAN Mar 29 '23

Cocaine Bear is not a horror.

2

u/online_republican Mar 29 '23

....cocaine bear was the protagonist

2

u/niles_deerqueer Mar 29 '23

I can’t believe I waited since 2015 for this.

2

u/tupe12 Mar 29 '23

Well you know what they say, third times the charm

1

u/Smart_Substance_7338 Mar 29 '23

third?? what was there besides cocaine bear

3

u/Dio_Ludicolo Mar 29 '23

Winnie the Pooh

1

u/Smart_Substance_7338 Mar 29 '23

oh i forgot that existed

-1

u/TheRedNextDoor Mar 29 '23

“cApItAlIsM pRoDuCeS vArIeTy”

-5

u/Flandersmcj Mar 29 '23

It’s because we are subconsciously afraid of Russia, which is symboled by a bear.

1

u/theneo71 Mar 29 '23

Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it's happened three times

1

u/EarwaxWizard Mar 29 '23

So there's FNaF, Whinnie the Pooh and the third one?

Edit: I read the other comments. Cocaine Bear

1

u/Mrgrayj_121 Mar 29 '23

You know at this point I’ll take the mouse jaws

1

u/Thatbendyfan Mar 29 '23

Actually, i don’t think it’ll release this year

1

u/Memphisrexjr Mar 29 '23

At least this one is based on true events.

1

u/superior_to_you Mar 29 '23

ah yes, the foundation of the Ursine Cinematic Universe have been laid

1

u/Metalsheepapocalypse Mar 29 '23

Is it gonna be better than Willys Wonderland tho….Nicolas Cage was so well versed in that movie, never missed a beat

1

u/vectoralgebraist Mar 29 '23

There's a whole Wikipedia article about pairs of similar films which released shortly one after another

1

u/TheHancock Mar 29 '23

I can’t wait for the let’s plays of the movie!

1

u/ralo229 Mar 29 '23

2022 was the year of Pinnochio. Maybe 2023 is the year of killer bears.

1

u/WheredMyPiggyGo Mar 29 '23

At the pitch meeting they were like "Bear with me here ..."

1

u/killer_queen_morioh Mar 29 '23

Bear year 😝😩❤️🐻

1

u/GoofedUpped Mar 29 '23

why is the logo the animatronic bear and not the cartoon bear?

1

u/Waderriffic Mar 29 '23

The Cubs haven’t even opened their season yet.

1

u/dashfredplayzreal Mar 29 '23

Cocaine bear was honestly more of a comedy.

1

u/OldRaggady Mar 29 '23

It's coming out in 2023?

1

u/PassTheJuicy Mar 29 '23

Bear down for midterms.

1

u/psychodeli_sandwich Mar 29 '23

Anyone calling cocaine bear a horror movie doesnt know what a horror movie is

1

u/SpeedyRex Mar 29 '23

It was advertised as a horror movie, and to be fair I don’t know too much about the movie because I only watched the pitch meeting

1

u/deathangelxx Mar 29 '23

Y’all do know Cocaine Bear isn’t a horror movie right?